Dude (Looks like a Lady): Farewell Timmy the male hen

Dear Timmy

I guess the clue came when we gave you a name.  Whereas the other hens got names like Hestor, Tonks, Lucy, Angelica – you got the name Timmy.  After the Famous Five dog, and a very masculine dog he was as well.

So how come that no one ever spotted that Timmy wasn’t a girl?  We asked the farmer.  He asked back.  Was Timmy  dominant?  Well, not really. You always seemed well down the pecking order.  Last to get your share of the food.  Last to get the treats.  And you always seemed a bit of a loner, left out from the others as they formed their little gangs.  Last week we’d find you on the roof of the hen house in the evenings, reluctant to get in with the others for the night.  It all makes sense now.

This week you gave yourself away by starting to ‘harass ‘your friends.  And then, 5:30am on Friday morning as I stood there waking up I heard two loud crows.  If we’d not worked it out so far, we did then.

So, you had to go really.  The path of the urban cockerel is not a popular one.  And now you’re with the other guys on the farm, a fine young Sussex cockerel and we wish you all the best.  You can make all the noise you like there, there’s no neighbours to upset.

Just for you Timmy, Aerosmith’s Dude (Looks like a Lady):

your friends and family at Schloss no81bob